Monogamy.

Monogamy: "The practice or state of being with only one partner at a time".  Personally, I've always been a big supporter of monogamy. Most people would agree with me on this. The romanticized idea of being with one person whom you love, and only one, is very appealing to our society. But who really, and I mean REAAALLY, follows this practice? True, a few people do. But it's disturbingly rare. From what I've observed in my twenty years of life, people generally cheat, more often then stay entirely true to one partner.

Even those who never physically cheat, occasionally find themselves longing to experience someone other than their partner. Don't deny that. Why else would they continue to talk to exe girlfriends and boyfriends or have conversations and rondevues with people of the opposite sex that their lover doesn't know about? Why would they flirt, look at porn, or fantasize? Even without the physical act of cheating, you can't deny that there's that psychological aspect... The white elephant in the room. Are men capable of never having the desire to be with anyone other than the person they love? Are woman? If they are, why do they feel the need to push their limits on this?

Monogamy, a concept that is unnatural, and doesn't work for so many people, so why is it even the accepted norm in the first place?

Is it because, as humans, we need to be monogamous to survive? What are the purposes of our beings? To reproduce, to progress, to make the world a better place- are these purposes really dependent on monogamy? Not at all. Most animals in nature are not monogamous. They love and care for their young the same way we do in our society, without the complications of monogamy, and they're been functioning like this for as long as we know. That being the case, why do we choose to accept monogamy as the rightful norm?

Ironically, as I say all this, I'm in a monogamous relationship right now. I'm in love, and it would kill my inside if my boyfriend cheated on me. I trust that he would never physically cheat on me, and I've come to accept that he talks to girls and I don't hear every single conversation. 

But at the same time, if someone wants to communicate privately with someone of the opposite sex, shouldn't they be allowed to follow that urge without complications?  It's easy to ask the question, why do people cheat? But I think that answer it kind of obvious. It's could be any of the following: it's some sort of sick thrill, they want to experience something different, they want to prove that they're still attractive, they became attracted to someone else, they got bored, they got distracted, they got horny, they got scared... Hmmm... But why DON'T people cheat then, if there's so many reasons to do it?

The main thing stopping people from doing more than just communicating with people of the opposite sex, are the elements of respect and disrespect involved. In our society, being with another partner is disrespectful. So we lock up our urges, and don't do it.

I can't speak for everyone. But I don't cheat because I don't want to disrespect him, and in return, I don't want disrespect me to hurt me. With disrespect comes embarrassment, with embarrassment comes hurt, and with hurt... well, it's bad. You get the picture. 

If our society didn't find it disrespectful to be with multiple partners though, then there wouldn't be the hurt and embarrassment involved. Without that, who's to say that anybody would care if they got cheated on or not? It wouldn't even be considered cheating, it would just be an accepted lifestyle... called polygamy. 

In conclusion, my personal opinion: when it comes right down to it, it's very possible that human beings aren't meant to be monogamous. Monogamy could easily have nothing to do with our nature, but be solely a product of the society we live in, hindering us from expressing our true needs and desires, and potentially bringing more pain upon us than we would endure without it. If polygamy was the societal norm, and there was no disrespect resulting from it, what harm could it bring? None, it would just be a lifestyle. However, to most of us (myself included), what cheating represents is so much bigger than what it really is. It represents disrespect, selfishness, and lack of self-control in our society. And with that being the case, polygamy, now, would be devastating. 

Just something I've been thinking about... See you next time,

Sarah